Problematic

"Thinking about it makes me scared, facing it makes me tremble."

Sigh, I just wanna talk about a problem. Well, the problem is about me. I dont know what is wrong with me. But I am scared. Firstly, sometimes and I mean sometimes it happens to me. I dont know what causes it or what it is.

So, anyway. There was one day, when I was reading magazine. Around 10.30. I was abit tired already. Then suddenly at around 11.00, that feeling came. I dont know how to describe it. Really. I just dont. To make it simple, I'll say this.

Heartbeats slowly but fast.
Mind is not thinking straight.
Movement becomes fast.
Not stable.
Scared.

I dont know what on earth it is. But my mind is playing tricks on me. I dont know why but it started happening this year. Only this year at the end of February. I gotten it 3 times when going to bed. It is only at night when I am about to sleep.

I try to keep from eating or doing anything that makes me not tired. Problem sleeping? Erm, Im dont think so. Im scared I will freaking lose it which I hope not. My schedule is simple now...

Sleep at anytime between 10.00pm - 11.15pm.
Wake up anytime between 6.30am - 9.00am.

I dont want to change it. Later I get that again. After that happen. When I close my eyes. Is like my brain is pounding my skull. Im not in the right mind! Is my mind weak? Isit some kind of sleeping disorder? Isit some kind of disorder? Or maybe, it is just me?

I need answers. But I am not sure I really want them. Sigh, I hope I just dont get it anymore. Everytime when night falls, I just get scared. I am scared because of the incident that happened to me. I am trying my best not to get it again. Yes, I think I AM eating right.

Sigh, anyway. Wish me luck. Is me battling my brains. Bye!